Time is a crawling fly...

Sometimes this break seems so long, sometimes it seems to run right past me.
There are 10 days till I return to Bellingham. One one hand, that seems like so many, when you think in terms of how slowly each day goes by. But at the same time, it seems rather short compared to the 21 days I started with...

I want to stay here and enjoy each moment, for fear that nothing will be like this ever again. I want to see friends that I can't see anywhere else, do things I can't do up in college, enjoy my freedom while I have it.

But there are things up in college that await me, and I can hardly wait to get back up there again.

Overall I think I'm doing a good job of keeping cool, being patient... I just feel like I'm stuck, frozen, between two motives, and sometimes this immobility can make me miss out on some good things right in front of me. Dang it...

Hmm, so what have I done since the update before? On Friday, it was yet another concert with my family. Saturday... shall be discussed later. Sunday it was my two brothers' concert. Monday I went and hung with Sonja. Tuesday I finally started making cookies. Wednesday I made more cookies and got a vist from Sonja again. And today... Made more cookies, got a visit from Michelle and Sarah, and decorated our main tree, finally!

So I'll elaborate on a few of those subjects. What was so cool about my brother's concert? Graham suprised us all with an improve clarinet solo during a jazzy song... one of those "older sister pride" moments! That was cool.

Hanging out with Sonja on m was ever so much fun! We watched the Grinch Who Stole Christmas (the classic cartoon version, of course) and a favorite of ours, Muppet Christmas Carol. We sang along with the Monday songs, laughed at the funny parts, questioned the questionable parts, and quoted our favorite quotes. We also tried to do a duet on piano... which kinda worked. Oh well, we loved that too! Then we started discussing other things in life, and had a very intellectual conversation... okay okay, it was all gossip. But hey! Bonding time is bonding time! It it was good times.

Tuesday, Cookies. Moving on...

Wednesday. More cookies. Sonja dropped by again to a) give me a present, and b) show me something hilarious: David Letterman's Top 10 "Ways To Know You Aren't the Most Popular Guy In School" hosted by... none other than Napoleon Dynamite! It was freakin' awesome, yo! What better way to talk about nerdiness than the most popular nerd out there?! Ah, good times...

So today... even more cookies. And then I got a nice visit from Michelle and Sarah, and after a nice present from Sarah, we all hung out and sipped our... water.... and talked of life, love, and who knows what else. It was nice to see those two again, it had been a while...
I also got my laptop taken from me. Stolen from me. Hidden from me. By my younger siblings. And I'll admit, I have been spending alot of time on my laptop... with a pretty legitamite reason, actually. But maybe it is time I put down the laptop. The major complaint I have is that I don't always feel exactly welcome when I'm "bonding" with the younger three. Oh well... Christmas is coming, afterall...
I did find my laptop eventually. Obviously. I'm sitting here writing this entry in my room right now.

Now there's a shocker: tomorrow's Christmas Eve. And the next day it's... Christmas! That makes me think time has teleported on by. Last time I checked I still had at least a week left... man. What feels doubley weird is that I've only been here for almost two weeks, as opposed to hardly leaving the house... it still feels like Christmas season just began. Hmmm... well, there are still 12 days of Christmas left afterwards, so the holidays won't be quite over yet.

The only day left out was Saturday. I wont' let that one completely out of the bag until the opportune moment... besides, it sounds better in person.

Still counting down, yet still trying to enjoy moments as they happen... it's a constant tug-of-war between the heartstrings...

... It was like a zoo!

That's what I've got to say about the people I hung out with on Wednesday/Thursday.

The plan was this: I was to hang out with people from my school--mainly my theater classmates at the Point Defience Zoo for Zoolights. Their names were as follows:
Kit
William (not a theater person, actually. Boyfriend of Kit)
Jess
Alden (these two are a pair as well
Mark
Random

Random and Mark--both guys in my area--come to pick me up. We have a fabulous ride to Tacoma, get lost 6 or 7 times, but still manage to come before everyone else shows up! We had some fun perusing through the gift shop, and then everyone arrived and we set off on our psychadelic zoo journey! Being one that's easily mesmorized... who needs drugs when you can get that trippiness? All these lighted animals, some of them moved, and such colorful landscapes... whoo! What a journey!
We then headed to Lacey for pizza, ate it, some of them went to Lover's Package for a bit (Kit, William and I didn't have proper ID, so we waited outside), then headed to Kit's house. We frosted at ate some christmas cookies, and Random and Mark and I discovered the joys of giving each other back massages... Good stuff. We talked with Kit's parents for a while, then headed over to Jess's place to sleep over.
Jess has a BIG, beautiful house, and it's in the middle of the woods--almost the middle of nowhere. Cell phone reception was nonexistant as well. So the boys, and sometimes the girls (I was the only one who didn't play at least once), played some video games for a while, then after some good rounds of that, they decided it was time for Truth or Dare. With that group, all I could say was, uh oh. There are literally no secrets with them. They are open with everything. And I mean EVERY-THING! It turned into truth or truth, because many of us became too lazy to do anything daring. Much of it was VERY sexually oriented too... so much, that became a rather overload for me. Eventually we got to some more innocent questions, thank goodness. William wanted to sleep after a while, so then everyone else but Kit headed out of Jess's room and down into her... room with couches. We then, ironically, got dead quiet. Random and Jess and Alden went back up to Jess's room, Mark and I were too comfortable to really go back, so we slept there for the night.
Next morning we all woke up and Jess and Kit made us some pancakes and waffles. We ate, talked, and laughed, then headed towards the couches to watch a movie. After that it was video games for some of the boys again, and wrestling/molestation/violation inflicted upon Kit and I from Random and Mark (don't worry, people--it was nothing unfriendly). Soon it was time to say goodbye, and the two aforementioned boys and I left and headed home. On the way, attempted to fall asleep in the backseat, but while listening to the conversation up in the front seats, that was impossible--they are really quite amusing! Random dropped me off, we said our goodbyes until school started again, and I returned to my abode.

Okay, I'll admit right now, I left quite a bit out. Details shall be discussed with me on a one-on-one basis. For now, you'll just have to read the summary. Too bad.

"I feel happy! I feel happy!"

That's right. I'm feeling happy. You want more details? Talk to me about it! I feel so happy...

So last week I took my finals.
Music: Optional, since my teacher missed the last day of school and very few got his study guide afterwards. If I took it, I would be able to drop my lowest test score. I got great grades on the last two tests, so even if this one went bad (which I'm sure it didn't) I'd be able to drop it anyway.
Theater: Thanks to a nice study group and good time put into studying for this, I conquered this one! It's the only one that I know the grade for: 94/100! Go me! I think that means an A in the class. Go me!! And because of this study group I have many more interesting and wonderful friends! Go me!!!
Math: Ugh. That's all I've got to say. Stupid math. I hope it's on a curve, like most math classes are...
Philosophy: Proofs. Therefore, I kicked butt! The Queen of Proofs reigns again! In the end, I loved that class. So nice to know you can really do something...

I came home. Oh boy. What a story. I was to give my friend, Adria (a floormate) a ride to Seattle, where she would meet her sister and later get a ride back home over on the East side of Washington. It took my mom a while to get here, and I, of course, have a million things to bring home. Thank goodness Adria was there! Nice to have a little slave labor--er, I mean, extra help once in a while. ;)
So they're doing construction on the freeway... slows us down a bit. Then we hit Seattle rush hour. Those of you in the area know what that's like. Ew. So once again, we were slowed down. My mom had to go get something from a vet in Seattle to help my rabbit at home, and coming away from the place we suddenly get lost. After several phone calls to my mom's friend (A Seattle savvy person, thank god), we finally get the poor girl to her destination. I sure hope the rest of her weekend was better!
Then coming out of Seattle... mom and I got lost. Not fun. I wanted to get the hell out of the car, she wanted to know where the hell we were... we tried calling home for my dad to help, but he was always out when we did. Oy vey. At one point my brother, Graham, picked up; I was trying to remain calm, my mom was already getting slighty hysterical. Mom always likes to give me directions when I'm talking on the phone, something I find exheedingly irritating because I cannot multitask THAT well... we both ended up shouting hysterically--my mom with directions at me, me into the phone at my brother. He couldn't help but laugh, and I don't blame him--it did sound funny! EVENTUALLY, we get the hell out of that damn city and get home. Thank God.

So I hang out at home for a while. So far the only one I've really kept in touch with from college is Alan. He and I talk for a while during the day, sometimes I'll go downstairs and watch some TV with my brother...

Sunday I attended my first concert with my family. Usually it's the case that I get dragged to those things. I don't mind the music, but being trapped in the car with my siblings... oy vey. This trip was actually pretty standable. We got to ride a ferry to Bremerton, and we got to look at the beautiful coastlines of the islands on the way... pretty forests, houses that I'd never be able to live in... and even some seals! So cute! What can I say, marine life fascinates me... everytime I go out to the Puget sound, I half hope that I will see orcas out there...
It's my dream to see wild orcas one day. It's even more of a dream to be able to touch an orca. I'd certainly be dreaming if I could swim with one... Ah, dreams. The aurora borealis is another dream I have. I'd like to see just one before I die, even better would be to see one of those spectacular celestial events that make it into photographs alot--you know, the ones with 4 or 5 different colors... ah, beauty.
Look at that! A complete train of thought derailment! Let's put her back on the tracks...
The concert was okay; it turned out that they switched the program around without telling my dad, so the people we came to see perform had switched places with a choir concert. They were okay; there were some high school groups that were pretty damn good, actually. So then we headed back, and we got to return to Seattle at night... any city looks beautiful at night, as... oh crap, SOMEONE in my family pointed out. (Fuzzy memories)
We went out for dinner, and heard about power outtages along the way. We saw a couple of dark areas too. When we got home... dark. "YAY! THE POWER'S OUT!!" said my three younger siblings. "Crap, the powers out!" Said Graham and I. Graham had to do some research for a debate the next day (homework reasons) and I wanted to get on AIM to talk to some far away people (social reasons). So I was plunged into complete darkness and complete boredom. My family started to go to bed at nine, and around that time (I turned my cell on, I think out of desperation) I got a phone call from Alan! YAY!!! We did our usual lengthy talks about who knows what, and that continued till... after 11, I'm pretty sure. The only reason it stopped as a matter of fact, was because my cell phone died. Oh well, it was a hell of a conversaton, as he said to me later.
Hm, so that was sunday... it's now Tuesday. 3 weeks... on one hand, it doesn't seem too long, but on the other, it seems like FOR-E-VER...

Mabye I'll do one of those "late night entries," like what used to happen in the summer time. You know, the ones with weird topics, strangely philosophical points, or just utter bizarreness...
So for now, updates on my life. If it bores you so much, then you can just blow it out your ear, cwapface!

"Heroes"

I
I wish you could swim
Like the dolphins
Like dolphins can swim
Though nothing
Will keep us together
We can beat them
For ever and ever
Oh we can be Heroes
Just for one day

I
I will be king
And you
You will be queen
Though nothing
Will drive them away
We can be Heroes
Just for one day
We can be us
Just for one day

I
I can remember
Standing
By the wall
And the guns
Shot above our heads
And we kissed
As though nothing could fall
And the shame
Was on the other side
Oh we can beat them
For ever and ever
Then we can be Heroes
Just for one day

We can be Heroes
We can be Heroes
We can be Heroes
Just for one day
We can be Heroes

~David Bowie

Rowan's inspiration for the day.

Thespians rock!

Ah, the wonderful, wonderful weekend...

I agree with Deanna's last entry. When I don't update, it's either the case where nothing cool has happened to me lately, or I've done so much cool stuff I don't have time to update. It's SO the latter of the two!

So on Sunday I went to a Theater 101 study group. I knew Kit from my class, and met some other cool people there. We had a blast studying--that's right, a BLAST studying! They are an AWESOME bunch of people! I wish my school had a "theater" group. There were some people who would fit in rather well, but we didn't really have a theater group in my class. We ended up going to dinner together, and were joined by some other people that were not of our study group, but were friends of those who were. I could not stop laughing at the table--like I will say a thousand times at least, they are awesome! We jumped to many different subjects, most of which very funny, but then we jumped to a torture conversation, something many of us no longer wanted to hear!! But then one of the guys, named Random, decided to end on a better note: he told us to take turns telling about the best thing that happened to us this quarter. I shared the moment when I got my complete Phantom of the Opera CD set, but I honestly wanted to say that I was so glad I met all of these fun, interesting people. As it turned out, Random said that for me. So we all ended in a big group hug, and afterwards we went and toured some of each other's dorm rooms--including mine.
That night, I was just going to get back to studying, when two girls--named Katie and Rachel--came to Allie's and my door telling us that "they had something to show us." Intrigued, Allie and I went to see such a thing. It turned out that in taking a break from studying, they had choreographed a dance to No Doubt's "Bathwater." It was very entertaining! At one point, the first chorus, they got stuck, so they called on us to help them. Suddenly those years of dance class I took years ago began to pay off. Allie and I began to help them cheorograph the rest of their dance, and we coached them through the whole thing. The ultimate performance was for two of their guy friends, Chris and Ben, but in the meantime they showed it to several other people in our building, including our RA! It was a great dance; it involved very sexy moves and long scarves, which were used to "rope" some of the boys in the audience at the end of it! Unfortunately, we were written up for making too much noise at one point-- that's right, I was written up. It was my first time, though, so it wasn't so bad. And come on, my record was to be blackened SOMETIME, right?! ;)

Another important thing: There was one guy at the dinner table who figured out that I had instant messanger because I said to the table at one point "Brb!" (Afterthought: "NERD!! *Doh!") We exchanged screennames. We talked to each other that night. And we talked to each other the next morning. His name's Alan. The more we talked to each other, the more things we found in common with each other. As a matter of fact, it was rather creepy... but not in a bad way. In a very very cool way, actually. I only thought this kind of thing existed in legends, and in only one true story I found out over the summer. But I tell you--we were becoming instant friends! It was truely amazing. I'd say this tops even Phantom of the Opera. I'm very glad.

But there's more. Come Monday, the day before the final, theather group gets together in the library for another study session. We arranged it at 5:00, which was 15 minutes before dinner. We decided to take the studying in the dining hall. Well, guess how much studying we actually did? Not alot. Guess how much fun I had anyway? ALOT! And as it turned out, Alan was there too! We wanted to watch a movie together later (something that he liked and concluded that I would too), but wanted to wait until after dinner to meet. But there we were! After many laughs and fun times at the dinner table, some of them wanted to watch a movie together. Alan and I decided this would be the time to watch our movie. We walked back to his home, Ridgeway (on the other side of campus--my first time being there!), to get the movie, and walked back to my dorm to get my laptop to watch it on (my computer is evidently better than his). We went to the lounge on our floor, despite the fact that there was someone studying there (we promised to be quiet!), and watched the movie. It's called Ping Pong (yes, some of you, I thought of Forrest Gump too!). It's Japanese movie, shown at a film festival once, and was praised. It was a good movie; I liked it, as he predicted. At one point we started to neglect the movie a bit to talk to each other, but we finished it, and afterwards talked some more and more and more... wow, conversation never got boring. We ended up being very close that night. And up late too. To midnight. I walked him halfway home, and reluctantly we parted. We plan to hang out many more times from now on!
So I'm just in a happy mood. I'm passing my finals (or at least that's the feeling I'm getting), I'm making new friends, I've just about found my soul mate, life is just la-di-da right now!

Catch y'all later!

Susanne Vega hits it home

Don't you love it when a song fits you just about like a glove?

"Maggie May"

I'll never be your Maggie May
The one you loved and left behind
The face you see in light of day
And then you cast away
That isn't me in that bed you'll find

I'd rather take myself away
Be like those ladies in Japan
Rather paint myself a face
Conjure up some grace
Or be the eyes behind a fan

And so you go
No girl could say no
To you

There's the way we may appear
But that will change from day to night
Would you ever see within?
Underneath the skin?
Could I believe you had that sight?
And so you go
No girl could say no
To you

I'll never be your Maggie May
The one you loved and then forgot
I'll love you first and let you go
Because it must be so
And you'll forgive or you will not

And so a woman leaves a man
And so a world turns on it's end
So I'll see your face in dreams
Where nothing's what it seems
You still appear some kind of friend

And so you go
No girl could say no
To you


This is a good illustration to how I've felt, how I feel; and some of it SHOULD be how I feel.
Dang it, this is going to haunt me for a ridiculously long time. It HAS been haunting me for a ridiculously long time.
Oh well. There are finals to study for. And thoughts and memories to be avoided.

Sister to Sister

kitcat4986: Keira, just so you know:
kitcat4986: This is not a 100% guarentee
kitcat4986: but it's pretty much a 99% one
kitcat4986: Men suck.
kitcat4986: ANYWAY...
Keira: ok.................why
Keira: ?
kitcat4986: eh, don't ask now.
kitcat4986: I just had to get that out.
Keira: okay dokey

How's that for older-sisterly advice?
God I hope this attitude changes soon... PMS, anyone? Plus right now men do suck. I know one of those things will pass within a week, but as for the other one... Someone help me.